The Kitten Chronicles

Mango

Meet Mango. That's the name that the children who live next door to me bestowed on the beast of a kitten that I adopted as a four-week old in mid May from the Bradshaw Animal Shelter in Sacramento County. He may look cute. He is cute. But, Mango serves a far more important purpose than just pure orange kitten cuteness. Mango is my new garden enforcer.

The Sacramento County Shelter likes prospective kitten owners to fill out a lot of paperwork before any adoption can take place. I clearly remember one question that the Bradshaw Shelter posed: "What do you expect your new kitten to do?" I nearly put down something snarky like "croon like Frank Sinatra," but I had second thoughts. I just put down the following: "be a typical kitten."

Bandit and Mango

In all honesty? I adopted Mango for a reason. The first was to become a lifelong pal to the Border Collie named Bandit. The same neighborhood children who named Mango were called upon to name the beast I brought home from the same Bradshaw Shelter in July of last year. But, Bandit needed a buddy. Bandit got a buddy. It worked. When the two aren't trying to bite each other to pieces in a never-ending play session, they are curled up in the most ridiculously heart-rendering pose you will ever witness.

They are my new Frick and Frack.

The second reason why I adopted Mango was out of pure garden frustration. An army of rats, opossums, skunks, birds, and other wildlife regularly assaulted the large gardens that I planted the previous two years. The large heirloom tomato crops were chewed up and eaten. Every kernel of Golden Bantam corn was stripped away and consumed. The California Wonder Bell Peppers were hauled off and spirited away. My nightly garden raiders even developed a taste for Yellow Crookneck Squash!

Garden in July

But if this wasn't bad enough? It didn't stop there. The 101st Airborne Rat Army that dropped in every night weren't just satisfied with stealing every last heirloom tomato. They didn't stop until they had consumed large portions of the plants themselves. Which should be poisonous to them. Unfortunately, these rats seem to be immune to anything in the deadly Nightshade family.

I've faced raids by rats in the past. In my North Natomas gardens they would drop in from time to time to filch a tomato or a mandarin. They might have even drilled a hole into a watermelon. But that damage was minor. I could live with one or two missing tomatoes. I could lose one watermelon or cantaloupe and "be one with nature."

But the garden raids that started two years ago were like nothing I had ever witnessed or experienced before. I had never before lost an entire crop of Brandywine tomatoes. Watching 60-70 Lemon Boy tomatoes suddenly vanish in the space of a week was simply too much to bear.

Tiny Kitten

Those big, giant, old-fashioned rat snap traps were not the solution. Sure, I might get five or six of them. But that didn't stop the dozens that came over the fences every night. Rat poison wasn't an option. That will just kill anything and everything that eats a poisoned rat. Besides, given a choice between rat poison and a vine-ripened Mortgage Lifter tomato, the rat is always going to choose the Mortgage Lifter.

Rats aren't stupid. They are, however, destructive.

Enter Mango. Stage right. I didn't really have high hopes. After all, the boy I had adopted was just a kitten. How is a small kitten going to stop a big and nasty rat? Or, more to the point, the 101st Airborne Rat Army? These are big, nasty, mean and hungry creatures. Will a kitten really stop them? A tiny orange ball of fluff?

Garden Enforcer at Work

That answer, so far, is yes he will. Yes, he has. But the most important test is yet to come.

Mango's education as a garden enforcer started with small prey. My boy began to haul small bugs into the house. Much to my horror, I realized those small bugs were, in fact, cockroaches. There's nothing quite like the feeling of dread that washes over you when the kitten hauls in a big, fat, fast cockroach and then drops it on the carpet.

Cockroaches run very fast. They head for the nearest dark crevice of safety, where they can set up a new home and produce lots of other cockroaches. That's what these bugs intended to do. Unfortunately, none of them were fast enough. Just before they could reach any measure of safety, Mango would catch them, flip them in the air, pick them up, bite them and start the entire play process all over again. When the roach stopped moving, he ate it. Every last bit of it. Munch, munch, munch.

You and I like popcorn, right? Perhaps a crunchy bell pepper? Tree-ripened fruit perhaps? My cat likes cockroaches. A lot. Deal with it. When he decimated the cockroach population in my yard, he took his hunt to the next door neighbor's house. The neighbor did not complain. Not one iota.

Squash Plant Patrol

I didn't adopt Mango to kill rats. I know this will probably happen at some point, but that wasn't my intention. My hope was he would scare them out of his yard. This is exactly what has happened. I can hear the squeals of terror that come at night when he surprises one. The next sound I hear is that of a rat scurrying over the fence to safety. That's fine with me. He's scaring the rats. He also chased a baby opossum into another yard. Perfect.

But, the biggest test is yet to come. The Garden Enforcer is doing his job, so far. However, the main crop of heirloom tomatoes has yet to ripen. While Mango has already prevented many raids from taking place, the real test will come in August, September and October.

Zero Damage

But, if you were to ask, my answer is "so far, so good." I'm harvesting vine-ripened tomatoes. I'm harvesting perfect Yellow Crookneck Squash. Garden peppers of all shapes and sizes are turning red and haven't been molested. Compared to what took place the previous two summers, the change has been dramatic.

But, will it last? Stay tuned. The Kitten Chronicles, featuring Mango the Garden Enforcer, will continue.